Thursday, January 03, 2008

Recap (of my life)

Happy New Year. It's still not too late to say that.

2007 is the past.

What a year.

2007 was a great year, at least for me.

I'm 20, going to 21.

Somehow, I still can't wholly accept the fact that I'm actually 20 and 5 months.

Today I went for basketball in a court in Nibong Tebal.

Found out there were some very young-looking players which I had never seen on the court. So i asked my friend and he told me they were some young players, like 17 and 18...

I was about to say "Then they are not really any younger than us...." and then I hesitated....

It was because I realized that I'm so far away from 17 or 18....

But part of me still refuses to admit that I'm 21.

Well, then I told my friend what came across my mind and he had the same feeling too. We are getting older.

Perhaps it's a transition period. We tend to think that age that starts with the digit '2' and '1', regardless of the actual difference, has a big difference. When you are 18, you are still a teenager and you bear no responsibility. You mess up everything and people will still forgive you just because you are a teenager and you know nothing about responsibility.

But 21, is an age that people expect you to take up certain responsibility (altho in real life a lot of them don't!) and people don't simply forgive and forget.

I guess it's the responsibility that makes me feel old. It's like an invisible burden (perhaps created by myself!). Although I don't really have any idea about what kind of responsibility is that, I can feel it.

This afternoon a friend of mine asked me about my new year resolution. I thought for a minute and I told him something that I have to do in this year:

i. Get myself a camera.
ii. Figure out what I'm gonna do for my final year project.
iii. Complete at least half of the 'destinations' list.
iv. Study and learn really hard. Not just to score in the exam, but to strive to be a competent and qualified engineer.

and in the journey of my life, 20 and 5 months on earth, I would like to distinguish my life, at this point.

Age 0 - 12: Nibong Tebal.
Those were years that I was so dependent. I didn't know what to do in my life. I wanted something because people have it. Well, that was also the time in my life when I had the most girls to have a crush on me. Oh once upon a time.

Age 13 - 17: Jit Sin High School, Bukit Mertajam
Bukit Mertajam is situated approximately 40km++ from Nibong Tebal. Jit Sin High School was a famous school back then (and still is). So I was lucky enough to enter this school. For a 13 year old kid whose only transportation is a bike, 40km is kinda far. For the first 2 years, I took bus to go back and forth everyday (for goodness' sake the bus took about 1 hour to travel from NT to BM as it used the traffic-jam route (to avoid from paying the toll) and half-way it would pick up someone else). So when I was form 3 and it was morning session, I rented a room there with another 2 friends of mine. and I stayed in the room for 3 years. To be able to study in JSHS is very fortunate I guess. This school gave me some real insight. I started to see professionalism. Students carried out things in the school and they were done nicely. Of course there some dark and nasty side of it. But who cares. I enjoyed my high school years a lot. and I met someone that I'll never forget and some friends that I'll cherish for the rest of my life. (hopefully!)

Age 18- present: Tunku Abdul Rahman College and University Tunku Abdul Rahman, Kuala Lumpur.
The time after I got my SPM results was considered one of the darkest moment in my life. I got some really OK results which is 11A's and 1B (OK coz there were some crazy fellows who got up to 17A1). That time, I wanted to study Electronics Engineering and I was hoping for a scholarship...or at least a government aided fund or anything. I never thought of going to a private college and university as I thought those are places for those who are not good enough to be in government uni. and I didn't want to study form 6 because I thought it's a waste of time (Mind you, 'I thought' only, don't get offended!) So I applied for scholarship and stuffs. And the worst plan is to go to Matriculation. and for ASEAN scholarship, I applied ASEAN and JPA only. This was because if I were to go oversea, I really need a fully-aided scholarship which covers school fee and expenses. Otherwise I'll burden my parents from supporting me. and of course I was not good enough for these 2 scholarship (and I didn't even get to be interviewed by JPA just because I got a B in my Pendidikan Moral!). So I waited for Matriculation (which was one year and I would go straight to local Uni). and it ended up I wasn't chosen for matriculation. For what reason I don't know but almost all of my friends were chosen. Just because I got 2 more A's than them.....

So I ended up in this TARC and UTAR. and I really don't like this idea that I'm in a private Uni. I would say UTAR has some very good lecturers but it's a university with all walks of students in it. It's probably not the best Uni in town I would say...simply because of the great diversity of the quality of the students in it. You can see the best and the worst in it.

But....I enjoy my life in KL. Somehow I see the purpose that I was enrolled in UTAR so I wasn't complaining anything. The rant just just to express my dissatisfaction towards the unfairness of education in this country.

So, you read about my life.

I haven't typed a long post like this in a while.

Have a great year ahead.


KY KHOR said...

Your purpose of enrolling UTAR?

My purpose of enrolling KDU was to graduate as fast as possible...... -_-"

specialhuman said...

My purpose of enrolling UTAR is to enjoy my University life....longer!!!


ImGodsLove said...

I think these are all about LIFE. Seriously, I don't see any part of mine being 21 as well.(please don't think dirty o,keke!~)

You see, our mind is till on the verge of changing us from adolesence to our adultery years. We want things to go slower in terms of time and age, we want to enjoy life and bear no responsibility but these are all reality that we have to face i guess. Like you said, we are getting older. Older in the sense of age, fizikal outlook and our life, but don't can be old,but not our HEART.

We must live young in order to live longer and happier. I hope, and i can see that you are cherishing and appreciating your life.That's a good thing bro!!~ Keep up that kind of motivation and god will always bless you!~See you!!

specialhuman said...


hey thanks for ur comment. and obviously u r officially 21. hahaha. I guess, this is time for us to start learning about adult life. hahaha.

about ur part that's not being 21... lol. u leave everyone to imagine! How evil r u! lol. juz kiddin~

Well, don't let growing-up corrupt our concept of friendship, hopefully. :D